Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
