Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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