so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
