i think my tv is drunk
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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