New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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