Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
