No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
