bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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