If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
