i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
What drink are we having for lunch?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
