Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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