Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I want to be your penis for a week.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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