Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize
