I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Randomize
