I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
