Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
they're like a gay fantastic four
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
