i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
