marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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