I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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