i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
