john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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