That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
