my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
