I wish you could order shots online.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Still dying that you shit outside
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
