So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
