i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
did you just send me my own nude
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
