Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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