I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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