Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
