grandma shit on top of the toilet
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Randomize
