garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
