I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
