Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
