her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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