wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
