omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
