I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
