is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
they call him Oral-B. enough said
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
