They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
