Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
