hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Your tits are I can't wait for
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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