We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
So many bounce houses so little time
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
