i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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