I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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