dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Randomize
