did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
