idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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