They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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