That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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