I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
